I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
