We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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