your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
