Well douche your snatch and let's go!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize