so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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