I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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