But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
More tranny stories later!
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Randomize
