ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
