He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
