mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize