she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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