That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
