So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
