i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
please come you make the beer taste better
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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