if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
