cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
