How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
