Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
