I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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