youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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