You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize