Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
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You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize