No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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