Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
