Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
