You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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