Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
