I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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