But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
