I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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