if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
