i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
