One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize