I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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