saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
