she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
