And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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