well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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