He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
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Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
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because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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