I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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