I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I look better un-naked...
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
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My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
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He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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