wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
