I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
