My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
