Sry I called you an 8
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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