well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
