How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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