hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
