I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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