Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
