i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Do vagina's smell?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.